Text 17: As one can cross over the ocean with seagoing vessels, one can cross the dangerous situation of the material ocean by living with a wife.
Text 18: O respectful one, a wife is so helpful that she is called the better half of a man’s body because of her sharing in all auspicious activities. A man can move without anxiety entrusting all responsibilities to his wife.
Text 19: As a fort commander very easily conquers invading plunderers, by taking shelter of a wife one can conquer the senses, which are unconquerable in the other social orders.
Text 20: O queen of the home, we are not able to act like you, nor could we repay you for what you have done, even if we worked for our entire life or even after death. To repay you is not possible, even for those who are admirers of personal qualities.
Śrīdhara Svāmi-kṛtā Bhāvārtha-dīpikā Vyākhyā
The meaning is that by supporting all āśramas through food donations etc., he himself crosses over while helping them cross with difficulty. (17)
Half of one's body refers to the wife, as both have equal eligibility in rituals. The pronouns connect to the third verse. Svadhuruṃ means the burden of seen and unseen karma. Vijvaraḥ means free from worry. (18)
Helābhiḥ means līlābhiḥ (playfully). The idea is that the senses of a married man generally do not wander here and there. (19)
You who are beneficial in many ways - we are not capable of repaying or becoming equal to you through reciprocation. Even others who are fond of good qualities are not capable. Even with a full lifespan. The word "or" indicates they are not capable even in other lifetimes. (20)
Śrī Vaṃśīdhara-kṛtā Bhāvārtha-dīpikā Prakāśa Vyākhyā
The meaning is that the householder alone is the support of all āśramas, through originating the vānaprastha āśrama, not through food donations etc. It should be understood that he helps the vānaprastha cross difficulties like hunger etc., and difficulties from lions and tigers etc. The idea is that by helping them, he himself crosses over the difficulties of saṃsāra. (17)
In rituals requiring fire, both husband and wife have eligibility, as per the śruti "Through marriage there is togetherness in rituals". Seen duties refer to protecting the home, collecting items etc. Unseen duties refer to serving gods, ancestors and guests etc. which lead to heaven. Adhyasya means entrusting. (18)
This is the meaning: Those in other āśramas, afflicted by lust, experience hells for a long time by engaging in improper sexual relations. In reality, all women are forbidden to them, so they inevitably reside in the seven-sun hell. But for a householder, since his wife is under his control, adultery is not possible, so hell is not possible. One who engages in adultery even there is not a householder, but fallen. His son will also inevitably reside in hell, as per the śruti "Those of evil conduct attain an evil womb". Thus the purport is that the householder āśrama is superior to other āśramas. Just as robbers loot people by taking refuge in a fort, but have no power over the fort-keeper, so the robber-like senses cause downfall of fallen brahmacārins etc. by sense enjoyment, but not householders, since their sense enjoyment is sanctioned by scripture and does not produce bad results. Or the enemies of the senses are sense objects, as he will say "One who wishes to conquer the six enemies should first strive after entering the home" etc. in the 5th Canto, Brahmā speaking this very meaning to Priyavrata. (19)
Thus only a householder, taking shelter of a wife, enjoys sense objects happily and does not fall to hell, but not a renunciate. Hence he says - We who are like me, attracted to the qualities of women - their qualities being skill in cleaning the home, producing offspring, protecting from improper relations, speaking pleasantly, cooking etc. - even those who appreciate these qualities are unable to repay women, and only enjoy being favorable to them. This is the meaning. (20)
Śrī Rādhā Ramaṇa dāsa Gosvāmi Viracitā Dīpanī Vyākhyā
Since the method of crossing over is explained by supplying the context, this is an arthokti (explanation of meaning). (17)
Due to joint eligibility, husband and wife should establish the fire together, as understood from the śruti stating their unity of action. Seen burden means supporting children etc. Unseen burden means rituals like agnihotra etc. Adhyasya means placing upon. (18)
The word helā meaning līlā (play) is found in the Viśvaprakāśa: "helā means disregard and play". Līlābhiḥ means actions arising from play like embracing etc. The Viśva also states: "Līlā is known as actions arising from play, sport, amorous mood etc." (19-20)
Śrīmad Vīrarāghava Vyākhyā
He says that even the fourth goal of life (mokṣa) is attained through a wife indirectly. A man with a wife, by supporting all other three āśramas through his own āśrama, becomes beneficial to all āśramas - this is the meaning of the householder āśrama. Vyasanam means the ocean of sorrow that is the tendency of the senses towards sense objects - he crosses over that. The example is: Just as one crosses the ocean by boats, so she is the boat for crossing to the fourth goal of life through control of the senses etc. This is the meaning. (17)
Yām indicates one desiring the highest good, meaning heaven and liberation. Ātmano'rtham indicates joint eligibility of both in means for heaven and liberation. The ya-words connect to the tā in the third verse. Having placed his burden of seen and unseen duties on that wife, the man moves about free from worry. (18)
Taking shelter of that wife, we would playfully conquer the senses, which are difficult to conquer by other āśramas like brahmacarya etc. The example is: Just as a fort-keeper conquers robbers, i.e. evil people like thieves. (19)
We are not capable of fully repaying or reciprocating to you who are beneficial in the stated ways, O mistress of the home, even with a full human lifespan. Even others who appreciate good qualities are not capable with a full lifespan. The word "or" indicates they are not capable even in other lifetimes. (20)
Śrīmad Vijayadhvaja Tīrtha-kṛtā Pada Ratnāvalī Vyākhyā
He elaborates on this. Kalatravan means one with an excellent wife. By his own āśrama, meaning the householder āśrama, through food donations etc., having supported all āśramas like brahmacarya etc., he crosses over the ocean of worldly difficulties - this is the connection. (17)
Svadhuruṃ means the burden of one's own duties. Adhyasya means placing upon. (18)
He says you are to be supported for this reason also. The senses themselves are enemies. Or, the enemies of the senses are sense objects. In this way the example also fits, as both are external. In the former case it was stated as a mere possibility. (19)
The sage offers praise to facilitate the meaning of his own upcoming statement. "We are not capable" - if you are not capable, then no one else like you is capable either. Hence he says "Even others who are attracted to good qualities" - meaning even other men who are attracted to qualities are not capable of repaying a wife. This is the meaning. (20)
Śrīmaj Jīva Gosvāmi-kṛtā Krama Sandarbha Vyākhyā
All āśramas. Because even vānaprastha originates from the householder, etc. (17-24)
Śrīmad Viśvanātha Cakravarti-kṛtā Sārārtha darśinī Vyākhyā
"All āśramas" means that he himself crosses over while rescuing all four āśramas from distress through giving food etc. (17) The wife who is half of one's own body, according to the śruti "The wife is indeed half of oneself", carries one's own burden, the weight of seen and unseen duties. (18) "Lord of the fort" means: Robbers indeed loot people only after taking refuge in a fort, so how can they prevail over the lord of the fort? The meaning is that the fort here is sense enjoyment itself. Those who have accidentally fallen there, like brahmacārins etc., are indeed corrupted, but not householders, because their special enjoyment is prescribed by scripture and does not produce bad results. (19) Thus, taking refuge in a wife, only the householder easily enjoys sense objects and does not fall into hell, unlike the renunciate. Therefore we males are not able to repay with reciprocation or become like you, the famous one, the excellent seed, even with our entire lifespan, meaning even with a complete lifetime. The word "or" implies even in other births. And other guests who are eager for qualities, meaning those who appreciate qualities. In this context, the singular "you" and plural "we", along with "lifespan" etc. indicate a joke. (20)
Śrīmac Chukadeva-kṛta Siddhānta Pradīpaḥ
The meaning is that taking up all āśramas, gathering them through giving food etc., he crosses the ocean of misery together with them. (17) The words "yat" connect with "tām tvām". (18) "helābhiḥ" means "līlābhiḥ" (playfully). (19) "anukartum" means to become similar through reciprocation to one who has done many favors. "Not able" means not capable. "Others eager for qualities" means those desiring qualities, meaning those greedy for qualities. They also are not able. (20)
Śrīmad Vallabhācārya Viracitā Subodhinī Vyākhyā
Thus, having explained that her request must certainly be fulfilled, he praises her as the remover of all sorrows: "All āśramas". The food provider for other āśramas is only the householder. One without a wife has inedible food, because of lack of fire there is the fault of killing heroes. Therefore, taking up the āśramas other than his own, by his own āśrama of householder life he crosses the ocean of misery, the sea of sorrows like hunger and thirst. Just as one crosses the ocean by ships or boats, otherwise one would simply be eaten by fish etc. (17) Moreover, "yām āhuḥ" - They call the wife half of oneself. One's own body is the form of consciousness, and the wife is the form of bliss. Or because of being half of the body. "They say" indicates authority. "Indeed" expresses the logic already stated. Because of the śruti "The genitals are Prajāpati, immortality, bliss." In some people's opinion, only one with a wife is qualified for rituals. The address "proud woman" is for speaking such words. Having thus explained the cause of happiness, he explains the cause of absence of sorrow: "In whom". "One's own burden" means one who is a draft animal oneself, constantly bearing the burden characterized as worldly existence. If the wife is favorable in this, she would take on the entire burden. This is well-known in the world and need not be explained. "Moves about" means he wanders as he pleases, meaning he becomes liberated. "Free from fever" means free from the fever of anxiety, otherwise there would be anxiety everywhere due to wealth etc. (18) Moreover - "yām" - Taking refuge in which wife, we would easily conquer by mere play the enemies characterized as the senses, which kill unjustly. Indeed enemies cannot be conquered by other āśramas, therefore only one with a wife conquers those difficult to conquer by other āśramas. Some say the senses do not trouble one with a wife. But conquest is in case of enmity; for one with a wife they have no enmity because of dependence on her. Even if there is enmity according to scripture, because of external experience of one's own bliss, the conquest of the senses is merely by disregard, as if incidentally. Conquest is the ineffectiveness of troublemakers, or the production of incapability. To say that mere ineffectiveness is conquest here, he gives an example: "Robbers, the fort-lord". Indeed there is no human goal in conquering thieves, but just as they cause trouble, one should simply take refuge in a fort. Conquest is not killing them, because of dissimilarity and because conquest is occasional. (19) Moreover, there is no reciprocation even for the service to a wife done in a single day, so he says "We are not". We are not able to reciprocate to you, the doer of the aforementioned service. Even the service that should be done is only for one's own sake, like ornaments or nourishing the body. Because of the address "mistress of the house", what service could one enjoying all pleasures daily in her house perform? "Even with the entire lifespan" - Thinking that she is to be enjoyed only for a certain time, and afterwards maintenance etc. will accomplish reciprocation, he refutes this, because she performs service for that long too. "And others" means even long-lived gods. "Eager for qualities" means even one quality of hers like begetting a son is impossible to reciprocate. Therefore, those who desire her qualities as means of accomplishment here and hereafter are unable to reciprocate, this is the meaning. (20)
Śrīmad Gosvāmi Śrī Puruṣottama Caraṇa Viracitaḥ Śrī Subodhinī Prakāśaḥ
Here in "yām". They state authority for the blissful nature of the wife-form: "Prajāpati" etc. And because meditation on bliss is stated there. The meaning is that she is thus as the accomplisher. "For speaking such words" means for speaking pitiable words in the previously mentioned manner. (18)
Śrī Giridhara-kṛtā Bāla Prabodhinī
Moreover, a married man, through his own stage of life, the householder stage, supports the other three stages of life by providing food etc., and thus maintaining them, while also crossing the ocean of misery himself, overcoming the sea of suffering such as hunger and thirst. An example is given - "With boats": Just as a boatman takes others across the ocean with boats while crossing it himself, so too [does the householder]. (17)
As stated in scriptures such as "The wife is indeed half of one's self", indicating the joint eligibility of the two in the duties that are means to heaven and liberation, he explains what was said about the threefold accomplishment - "Whom": For a man desiring the good known as heaven and liberation, the scriptures declare the wife to be half of one's body. Therefore, your despondency is not appropriate, as you are worthy of pride, hence he addresses her as "O proud one". The word "yām" (whom) is connected with "tāṃ tvām" (that you) from the third verse. It is on that wife that a man places his yoke, the burden of seen and unseen duties, and moves about carefree. (18)
Relying on the wife, we householders easily conquer the senses, which are enemies difficult to overcome for those in other stages of life like celibacy. For a married householder, the senses generally do not stray here and there, so "conquest" here simply means the absence of obstruction. An example is given - "Robbers": As a fort-keeper conquers robbers and thieves, meaning they do not trouble him, so the senses do not trouble this one. (19)
O mistress of the house! We, or even others who appreciate good qualities, are not capable of fully repaying you, who provides the aforementioned benefits, with our own favors to become equal to you, even with our entire lifespan - or from the word "vā", even in other lifetimes. Those who say "We are able to do that" are indeed ungrateful. (20)
Hindī Anuvāda
Just as a man boards a ship and crosses the great ocean, in the same way a householder, giving shelter to other stages of life, through his own stage of life, also crosses the ocean of sorrow himself. (17)
O proud one! A woman is said to be half the body of a man who desires the three goals of human life. Placing the burden of his household on her, a man can roam freely without worry. (18)
The enemies in the form of senses are extremely difficult to conquer for those in other stages of life; but just as the owner of a fort easily subdues the plundering enemies, in the same way we easily conquer these enemies in the form of senses by taking shelter of our married wife. (19)
O mistress of the house! Neither we nor any other man who appreciates virtues can fully repay the favors of a wife like you in our entire lifetime or even in future births. (20)
SB 3.14.17-20
